It’s been a week today, Since You have been away from us, for up in mountains with low temperatures which are snowing since.
The first few hours were brutal. As you started to move towards your Irwin Dorm till we reached home, I checked my phone every ten minutes. That first night at hotel in Shimla to first night at home without you, both Mom and I kept wondering what you would be doing at that instance.
The next morning, Your MOM asked me “Whether to shift your clothes or be there in the Cupboard as usual, To which i clearly said nothing is shifting My son soon gonna visit us and he shouldn’t find any change, I really felt weak and missed you so bad.” And then we both had a good cry.
I checked my phone all day the next day for your or Your Matrons Message (Ms. Deepika). Other people texted, emailed, and/or called, and everyone I met in those first few days asked about you. I had to suck it up and tell them all the same thing – we haven’t heard from him. Not a word.
I remembered what your Director BCS in his Orientation speech said, “No news is good news.” But you know what? No news didn’t feel like good news.
I asked your MOM about why you din’t replied on my bye as well why at parting – Were you too upset? Were you too lost? Were you trying to tell us that you din’t want to? or maybe just you were just too excited?
We also reviewed the reasons for sending you at BCS – it was as if we needed to keep reminding ourselves (As i was rethinking to take you back and forget about keeping you their). We knew we wanted you to enjoy more time outside and outdoors away from Idiotbox and Mobiles, more time with friends whom you can bond for a lifetime, more time exploring your capabilities beyond and between education and school. We tried to picture all of those happy confident kids we saw for last one year on BCS facebook page, Videos and over phone calls to Alumini’s. Also specially seniors we met at “The Kothi” & “Public Choice” and specially “Shrey, who gave us the school tour” during drop-off, and we knew that would be you one day.
Most of all, we told ourselves – over and over! – that you wanted to go to Bishop Cotton School. You were prepared to grow independently from us(amateurs) amongst Jiaan and other friends, and you could learn so much from a team of most learned and passionate people who share one of the oldest values and have proven to be great at cultivating students like Ruskin Bond, Ratan Tata and likes. Do you remember when we first told you that you could go to BCS? At age 4 and I still remember, we were awake whole night reviewing their websites and videos online, “Yes!” and BCS striked you the most, and then you looked at me in the eyes and said, “I will go to BCS. I will love to stay at Shimla.”
But I missed you. Terribly. And I wanted you back with me. I also wanted you to write. Or call. Anything!, Ms Deepika(Matron) can vouch on same as she knows how much i must have bothered her since, on how have you been from an hour you were away from us till now.
She said the same that “Boys are settled and doing well”, but then she shared with me your first picture inside the dorm with your friends. I perked up. I realized that I was so hungry to hear the story of what happened, what all you did, about your friends, are you keeping warm and lastly what all you ate. Her final comment was you will start calling us in fifteen days. She told me that she is looking after you and ensuring you keep enough warm. She for us is your new guardian at BCS boarding school.
We met many parents outside your Irwin’s Dorm, One lady came to drop her son, She told me that her boys and daughters– all three of them! (youngest one in BCS, Daughter in Scindia and the eldest in Sayaji)– have recently told her that boarding school was the best thing their parents gave to them, as daughter recently been for a student exchange programme and many good reasons.
I remember this and your pictures shows you happy, And that’s when, it hit me – I needed to stop thinking about me, and my feelings, and my needs. BCS was not about me; it was what we knew would be best for you. Deep down I knew it all along, but my heart still aches for you. Still does.
Anxiously & eagerly waiting for fifteenth day. I want to hear from you – “Hi Papa, Its Aarav its amazing at BCS you now the ground, you know my friends, my faculties, we went for an excursion and finally, I’m so happy I came.”
Aarav, you have no idea how difficult it was sending you away from us. I’m not offended when people ask me, how can i send my son away from me at such age as i know this is the love that makes me strong and think about your future, which will be shaped better at BCS.
Don’t worry about us here. Aayansh and MOM are just fine.
See you in first week of April on your first Exeat weekend.
Love you more more more,